i’m pretty sure this game is a sick joke or smthing in which ubisoft wanted 2 make a social experiment and see how people would respond if they presented the most disappointing, sexist, boring portrayal of a historic time period theyve ever considered in their career. this is the game where they clearly stopped giving a shit like i mean i lost a lil bit of hope at revelations but i think now the headquarters probably reeks of axe body spray and they may or may not be replacing the ubisoft logo with a monster energy drink motif.
french guy (but not ACtually french because french people sound fuckin silly we cant make a game with him havin a french accent are you for real lmfao) and his 3 cloned teenage mutant ninja whitebreads roam paris just chillin out on the notre dame, a building that took a full year for several professional trained teams to reproduce on a perfect scale. unfortunately none of them are women, because as we all know, thats just too fuckin hard.
so i guess you can like play as arno + the backstreet boys with ur friends but ironically i guess ubi wanted to demonstrate how entirely interchangeable these boring ass characters are because u dont actually ever get to play as anyone but arno. so thats cool. theres a lady called elise (no. no i dont mean the one from ac liberation. ANOTHER dark haired french white woman with a red sash and a brown coat. haha) that you probably have to save, and can someone please fucking chop off 2 of my fingers if she DOESNT end up dying at some point because ill literally donate those fingers to ubisoft so they can shove them up their ass for making this fucking game in the first place. goodbye